So let's catch up a few years in a few words.

I am in love with J, S's sister,

Funny really cos when I 1st met S after 15 years, he wanted me to seduce J.

2006 was a weird year, quit Morrisons, went to live with S, an old mate fron Uni, years before.
He was undergoing treatment for prostate cancer, he had a great job, Head of Operations, 30,000 staff.

We went back to 1977 when we first when to University in Southampton.
S did law and was in Connaught hall, just across the road from Montefiore Hall, brand new in 1977, 6 rooms to a flat, kitchen & 2 loos.

S has sadly died now, he was only 51.

We had so much fun...I miss the bugger.

bed now
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It's been years since I have updated this.

I have been in a stable relationship with J for over two years now.

We met at S's 50th birthday party. Of course it wasn't the 1st time we had met, went back to the late 70's, when S & I would run rampage through Berko.

I have never gone as red in the face as when i came down to breakfast after S's 50th.
S was sitting in his chair watching TV, N was at the dining table and asked me if I had any luck the night before up the house side steps.

S guffawed.

J, he did warn you about me.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Lots of peope have said Alex you must write a story.

So here is my 1st.

Have you ever been so bolloxed that a late night race to the car to get my hidden (from her ---sleep now) stash, keep lights off, cant let her see.

"Fuck her, let her see"

Artwork















http://www.jacksonpollock.org/

Bankers Trust.
Now taken over by Deutsche.

I worked there for 18 months, contracting, great pay, hard work and fantastic fun.

Names I remember.
Philippe Bibi - Analyst
Simon Stanhope - Project Leader Back Office
Ian Gillies - Project Leader Front Office.
Alex Rawson - Programmer/Analyst
Arthur 'Taffy' Ellis - Programmer/Analyst
Gordon Reffell - Programmer/Analyst
plus about 20 more that I cant remember.

Task : Equity Derivatives Trading System.
Location : Appold Street, London & Southwark.


We developed this system from scratch.
Resources used :
Prep - a Bankers Trust product which wrote 'C' code and Vax Basic code from the in-house proprietary product.
DECIntact - a transaction processing sub-system, originally written by Bankers Trust, but so successful DEC bought it.
VAX Basic - a truly wonderfully fast language, both in execution and programming.
Vax 'C'.
VMS - later to become OpenVMS.

The Equity Derivates department, some 40 dealers, had been struggling with a cobbled together system using Access...and not much else. Bankers Trust decided to spend some money on putting this right.

We spent 12 months programming, just to get the infrastructure in place, tested & secure.
Add currency, Remove Stock, Modify Customer, Add Settlement Rule.

Now we had to write to proper business side of things.
See a stock price...press a button and automatically, up on your screen would come...history graphs, risk analysis and finally recommendations...all database driven.

The dealer then had to make a decision...Buy or Sell.

It was looking great, we went into testing...."not fast enough" shrieked Phillippe.

Errrrr...OK....pre-load all common database look ups in Global Sections.

Nope.

Right then....what's slowing us down ?

It's the 'C' modelling.

No problem...put that on an Ultrix box, that's all it will have to do. No time slot problems with the other 600 users.

Hmmmm....still not good. What the hell is wrong ?

Answer...the hard disks weren't fast enough.
Couldn't get the data to the processors fast enough.

Jeez...what can we do ?

Solid state ! OMFG, those things cost a fortune.

"Who cares", they bellowed, "Just get it done, you have an open budget"

We shipped in a couple of 128MB solid sate discs, cost about £125,000 each at the time....ridiculous I know, considering my camera has 128MB removable CF memory...and you can get that for £20 now !

Lets run it all up now.

Press button and.....wham....graphs, analysis and the all important..."BUY/SELL" flag.

We went live, it was an enormous success. Those 40 dealers made £160M profit in ONE year.

Head dealer was given a £4M bonus, not bad for 28 years old.

Seems all a bit unfair, but never mind. I had done my job and I loved it all.
I can't say I did too badly though. I remember putting invoices in for £12,000 a month.
Not surprising there were a few 80 hour weeks in there.

A great experience.

Right or Wrong.
I don't know what brought this up in my brain.

In 1977, I was finishing my 'A' levels and wanted to go to Uni. What better way than to get paid to go.
I therefore applied to various establishments, one of which was the army.

Thus I was sent to RCB - Regular Commissions Board - Westbury, Wilts for 3 days.
I had been to RCB before, but that was only because my school was nearby in Warminster, and the army needed some 'fake' RCB candidates for a video promotion that they were doing.

Anyway...back to RCB....a pretty gruelling ordeal.

One of the tasks was in an exam room, silence, a task...and a time limit.
Turn over the paper and, there is a photo of a soldier, rifle aimed at camera.
Titled "Who is right? Who is wrong ?"
Discuss this topic in more than 500 words and less than 3000.

Cripes ! I thought.
Anyway. I sort of described how a young squaddie, tired, at unease, in a very hostile envirnoment had in fact shot an innocent.
I ended my 'story' with
"Who is right? Who is wrong ?"
"What is right? What is wrong ?"

I think that didn't go down too well.

Anyway, I failed to be taken on by the army, good job too I reckon.
I did however get my University Scholarship from Jaguar Rover Triumph...but thats another story ;).

Back to "What is wrong ? What is right".....I dunno. A lot has to do with perspective.
I am hoping to demonstrate this here shortly.
Stories from the same situation, told from another perspective.

Simian Lines

The simian line runs across the hand replacing the heart and head line. It is a sign of inner tension.

It may be destructive or creative or even both.

http://www.handanalysis.com/simian.html

People with Simian Lines generally live their life differently than most other people who do not have Simian Lines. Not necessarily living better nor worse. Just living more intensely with an undercurrent of uneasiness.

http://www.humanhand.com/simian.html

It is interesting that a number of well known people with a Simian Line have made a positive contribution to history. They include British Prime Minister Tony Blair (both hands), former Russian President Nikita Kruchev, writers John Steinbeck and Henry Miller, to name some well documented cases.

People with a simian line never really find peace. They spend their entire lives searching for an answer they never really find.

To the person with the simian line there is only right or wrong and nothing in between. People with this line work twice as hard, study twice as hard and fight twice as hard.

Persons with the Simian Crease on even one hand often feel isolated, seeing themselves as radically different from their peers. They do not recognize their own talents and may consequently suffer from problems with self-esteem.
http://www.astropalmistry.com/study4.html


I have them on both hands.



I have only met one other person with a Simian line. Gordon Reffell. Brilliant 'C' programmer.
Worked with him at Bankers Trust on their Equity Derivatives Trading System.
He used to call me "Awesome Rawson".Lol.
Met again at Cantors, he came in as Head of Front Office Systems, while I was Back Office.

Unreal Tournament.
http://www.unrealtournament.com/

http://www.unreal.com/

This is a PC based game.
I like this still. Game of the year.
I suppose I am a bit of a Flak cannon 'whore'


Top picture is VC, Flak Cannon, fetching green & Grey. Liandri Central Core.


Next VC in fetching blue, rocket launcher in hand, location Hyperblast.


Next one is VC & Flak cannon, in red , Hyperblast again.


Next Flak Cannon...he he...told ya I liked them, blue. Location Curse[]


Lastly, blue wimpy VC with multigun. Fetid Sewers.




I see that they have brought out UT 2007
http://www.unrealtournament2007.com/

I might get that.

Addiction.

For anyone that knows me. I'm an expert on addiction.

Current One

Crib ! Yes, that old card game that they play in pubs sometimes.

That's the one.

I am quitting this addition.
I can't take the pace.

I haven't got the time for this any more.
Takes up too much time. 1:30 til 11:30 everyday.
joined the Loonies at the beginning of the year with a friend.
He soon left. Ya gotta be tough to be a Loonie.
Yes I got badly drawn into this one.
I now feel it's time to quit.
No longer clicking on http://www.pogo.com
and quickly followed by http://www.myleague.com/teammates/
See whats happening.


Then zoom in on Standings to see how Loonies are doing http://www.myleague.com/php/page.php?p=lad_frame&t=myleague&lng=eng&l=teammates&g=cl&svr=cgi4&pl=
You have to Press Display under View Ranks, middle top on last link.

Yay...No1 ....or No 6 now.


Then see recent Winners http://cgi4.igl.net/ts/displaywinners.php?path=teammates
Wtg Loonies...3 Tourneys out of 4 today !!!



Then look at how I am doing http://www3.igl.net:81/perl/find.cgi
Not too good...Oh well.


At least I can go out on a personal high. http://www.myleague.com/php/page.php?p=hall&t=myleague&lng=eng&l=teammates&g=cl&svr=cgi4&pl=
BTW You may have to Refresh the last URL a couple of times before you get it. Cases is weird.

I managed to get into the Hall of Fame, two entries. 7th higgest win percentage .50 games and more. 7th highest win percentage, 500 games and more.

So this huge waste of my time has got to go.
Classify as an addiction, along with http://ebay.co.uk

Back to my ebay
See how the sales are. Pack cartridges
Yup another addiction.
I really gotta find another one.

How to use Ebay !
Ever used Ebay ?
Buying or Selling ?
How did you do ?

I am going to grab some screen shots and explain some bits.

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Nokia-CARK-126-Car-Kit-suitable-for-most-Nokia-phones_W0QQitemZ280041609320QQihZ018QQcategoryZ35191QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem